I mentioned a week ago that my husband and I were planning to have another baby.  Our daughter’s sixteen-months-old, I’d like to work full-time again once my children are in school, I’ll be thirty-five in a few months… we’ve decided it’s the right time for us.  Sure there are reasons it’s NOT a good time, but the pros outweigh the cons.

All this talk about babies and pregnancy got me to thinking and reading about fertility.  I’m sure you’ve heard, just like I have, “You got plenty of time!  Don’t rush.  Women are having babies later in life…” blah, blah, blah…  You’ve probably said it yourself.  Well, do we really have a lot of time?

Marie Claire magazine discusses aging and fertility in its February 2009 issue.  In the article “Fertility 101” we are reminded that our eggs age and we run out of viable ones the older we get.  Most women have a fertility peak in their 20s.  Around thirty-one, fertility starts to drop.  By age thirty-five, one in four women have trouble getting pregnant.

So, do we have plenty of time?  Not all of us.  Some women have more time than others… do you know which one you are?

Now, this in NO WAY is encouraging anyone to rush in to having a baby if you are not ready.  I am just intending to point out that if you are married, have a steady career, and think you have plenty of time to put it off, that may or may not be true for you.

If you find yourself having to postpone having children for a few years, the article gives tips for boosting your fertility:

1.  Control Stress

2.  Take folic acid early and often

3.  Quit smoking

4.  Don’t overexercise (I’m certainly not in danger of doing this)

5.  Drink conservatively

6.  Maintain a healthy weight

I encourage you to read the article in its entirety and other fertility resources if you interested in adding to your family.

My preconception checkup went well… so, I’ll keep you posted.

I received the following family food expenditure photos in an email.  You know how that goes… good information, but no particular origination source to site.  Nevertheless, I thought it was interesting enough to share with you because…

1)  The current economic slump has many of us looking closer at our spending habits and thinking about ways to save money.  Some families may be buying more groceries and eating out less.  Seeing how others eat for less may inspire someone to implement more creative ways to shave bucks off his or her own family food expenditure bill.  Click here to learn 20 ways to save on groceries.

AND…

2)  The current obesity rates give cause for pause (hey, that rhymes).  We need to make our nutrition and overall health more of a priority.  Taking a closer look at our junk to healthy food ratio, may allow us to see where the obesity epidemic and other weight-related problems should be attacked first–at the dinner table.

Take a good look at the family size and diet of each country, and the availability and cost of what is eaten in one week:

Italy: The Manzo family of Sicily
Food expenditure for one week: 214.36 Euros or $260.11

Germany: The Melander family of Bargteheide
Food expenditure for one week: 375.39 Euros or $500.07

United States: The Revis family of North Carolina

Food expenditure for one week $341.98

Mexico: The Casales family of Cuernavaca
Food expenditure for one week: 1,862.78 Mexican Pesos or $189.09

Poland: The Sobczynscy family of Konstancin-Jeziorna
Food expenditure for one week: 582.48 Zlotys or $151.27

Egypt: The Ahmed family of Cairo
Food expenditure for one week: 387.85 Egyptian Pounds or $68.53

Ecuador: The Ayme family of Tingo
Food expenditure for one week: $31.55

Bhutan: The Namgay family of Shingkhey Village
Food expenditure for one week: 224.93 ngultrum or $5.03

Chad: The Aboubakar family of Breidjing Camp
Food expenditure for one week: 685 CFA Francs or $1.23

So, what’s your family eating?  How much is it costing per week?

I have to admit, after living in my last apartment nearly three years, if one of my neighbors in the apartment community walked past me right now, I wouldn’t have a clue who he or she was.  In fact, I can’t remember the last time I had a recognizable neighbor.

One of the things I looked forward to about moving in this house, was the idea of actually having some neighbors I may be able to connect with.  Well, we connected…

You probably are guessing by the title of this post that it wasn’t the best of connections… not the worst… but a little different than I was hoping for.

Yesterday morning, “Handyman” came over to install a lock on our gate door, leading to the backyard.  Right after Handyman was done and gone, my next door neighbor came over and stated that, although he could not prove it, he believed Handyman stuck something through the fence and cut his (”Neighbor’s”) dog’s face.  Neighbor stated that he heard his dog going ballistic and heard Handyman hushing him.  Neighbor stated that when he looked at his dog, there was blood all over his face and the fence.  Neighbor wanted to look at our side of the fence, which I agreed to.  There was nothing on our side of the fence.  Since I had on my robe and my daughter was eating breakfast, I did not look at Neighbor’s side of the fence as he offered.  He showed me a bloody rag that he said he used to wipe his dog’s face with.  He stated there was no way his dog could have done that to himself and he was going to take pictures.  He stated that he sees his dogs as kids and he will shoot anyone who messes with them.  He stated that his dogs are “secured to the max” and there to protect his property.  He stated that he does not blame us for what the man may have done, but since we are living here, we are responsible for anything someone does while on the property.  I told him that I hoped Handyman did nothing that he was being accused of and that I hoped his dog was ok.  I told him I understood how important his dogs were to him and that I would keep a record of what he alleged transpired and have someone speak to the man about it.

My husband has had several different discussions with Neighbor prior to this incident.  And, on EVERY occasion, Neighbor has mentioned shooting someone if they blah… blah… blah.  This was my first interaction with him and he made sure I understood his shooting policy.  So, this got me to thinking about neighbors… and shootings… and well, Joe Horn .

Joe Horn killed two men as they were suspected of robbing his neighbor’s house.  Wouldn’t everyone want a neighbor who was so protective of his neighbor’s property that he would be willing to shoot and kill someone over it?  (long pause for emphasis)  Would you be this neighbor?  Apparently, in Texas, this is the kind of neighbor we want since he was  no-billed by a grand jury.

And since I needed a contrast to Joe, Ned Flanders entered my mind.  Well, not really.  I had to ask my husband if he knew of someone who would be the opposite of Joe.  I don’t even watch “The Simpsons”.  This Simpson’s character is a compassionate neighbor, who everyone loves, but just gets under Homer’s skin.  This timid pushover would certainly not defend his neighbor’s or his property with deadly force.  But, who would want to be a pushover?  And, moreover, who would want a pushover next door neighbor who would witness theft and do nothing?

So, I’m new to this neighbor thing and would like to know what you think?  I have a potential “Joe Horn” living  next door.  Should I be glad?  Or should I be concerned about my own family’s safety, living next door to someone who may be a little trigger-happy?

Apparently, there are quite a few migraine-sufferers who would like more information on how I became migraine-free by drinking green tea.  So, Melissa and Anne –I hope this helps.

I started out drinking a cup of Hedley’s Earl Grey Green Tea (20g) that I received as a gift.  I think it’s some sort of specialty gourmet kind that I couldn’t find in the store.  I had it in the cabinet for a while, but since I wasn’t a tea drinker, I didn’t bother with it.  One day I stumbled across an article about green tea helping people lose weight.  It is an antioxidant so, it helps to remove impurities from the body.

The same article mentioned that green tea was linked to relieving migraines.  After I discovered several other articles singing praises about green tea, I tried it.  I drank the tea when I didn’t have a migraine and felt energized.  I drank the tea when I felt the onset of a migraine and it went away.  You know the rest of the story… I haven’t had a migraine in over two months now.

The beauty of all this is that green tea actually has additional health benefits.  Research has shown that it has been helpful in fighting common medical conditions, such as:

• cancer
• rheumatoid arthritis
• high cholesterol levels
• cardiovascular disease
• infection
• impaired immune function

So, you see–green tea is considered a “miracle” drink that we should drink often… daily.  I ended up buying a different kind (click on the photo below) in the store this past week.  So far, so good.

Ok, I got excellent responses from yesterday’s post , so this is Part II… the Finale… I promise.

7.  IN HEALTH:

I have been struggling with migraines since I was a teenager.  I mean, the kind that knock you to your knees.  Well, I just learned that I have been throwing away money on advil, excedrin, prescription ibuprofen, and tylenol.  I learned that I wasted time on homemade remedies like pressing the pressure points on my head and hands, soaking my hands in warm water, and placing a cool towel on my forehead.

All I do now is drink GREEN TEA.  That’s right.  GREEN TEA is my cure.  I haven’t had a migraine in two months.  This is after approximately eighteen years of having at least two episodes (meaning, they last for several days straight) a month.  Ha!  Who knew?!

8.  IN RELIGION:

I’ll skip all the hows and whys on this one and just get to my lesson.  I learned that I have never and probably will never be a “religious” person.  I have too many issues with religious practices and “authorities”.  I learned it is better for ME to be “spiritual”.  By this I mean, it is more important for ME to put my personal relationship with God first rather than engage in any ritualistic, doctrinal, typically non-biblical beliefs and practices.

I must read my bible daily, pray to God, commune with others and share of His goodness, be a good steward of His money, and strive daily to be more Christ-like.  This is not bound to any particular church affiliation or pastoral relationship.  Doing these things won’t make me the most popular on a church board, but my spirit will be fulfilled.

9.  IN BLOGGING:

I started this blog on September 17, 2008 because family is important to me and I love to write.  I thought I would just mention daily about some part of family life and perhaps someone would learn something.  But, this blog is more than that.

Throughout the years, I have assisted clients in getting divorced, collecting and delaying child support, terminating and earning custody rights… and I have hated every moment.  Sure, I do my job well.  But, the fighting… the tit for tat… the mean-spirited, back-stabbing, selfishly blood-sucking members of each family that decided it was better to go for blood than remember the love they once shared for each other… or if there never was any love, just remembering “do unto others, as you would have them do unto you”…  Argh!

Although family law is not the only law I practice, it is the field that hangs heaviest on my heart.  I play my part in resolving disputes and further dissolving broken families, but I can’t help but wonder if there was another way.  Was there something I could have done to SAVE the family?  Sure, I wouldn’t have any family law clients if all families were happy all the time (except for adoptions–now, I LOVE those), but I’m ok with that.  Family is that important to me.

Now, for my lesson.  I learned that this blog is not just for me to pore my heart and soul out, but to receive support and knowledge from you, the readers.  This blog is therapeutic for me because I can get my thoughts out, be reminded of the most important things in life when I have a bad moment, and learn from objective strangers… and the few family and friends that pretend to enjoy this blog.    This blog is not just about holding other families together, but MINE as well.

THANK YOU FOR READING.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 

I’m scared to step on the scale. 

Laura at Junk-Fundaholics discussed “America’s Worst Holiday Foods ” on Dec. 26th.  I’ll tell you–I am guilty of over-indulging myself this holiday season.  Yes, we’ve been moving.  No, I didn’t have time to cook.  But, surely I have more self-control than to eat all greasy foods, drink carbonated drinks, and eat so many servings of the peach cobbler and red velvet cake my in-laws brought us.  Right?

Apparently, not.

Laura went on to explain:

“…studies show the average person consumes an extra 600 calories a day between Thanksgiving and New Year’s, which translates to an extra six pounds of belly fat heading into 2009.”

Oh, no!  That’s me.

I’ve been complaining about needing to lose more of my preggo weight.  I was doing pretty well too.  I drank lots of water, had the recommended amount of fiber, stayed away from fried foods, counted calories… and then, boom.  Not only have I not been exercising daily, but I started eating Jack-in-the-Box, Sonic, Frenchy’s, and Popeye’s.  My goodness.  I am really ashamed.

The Fitness Diva just addressed this recently in her blog “The Weight of the Holidays “.  She has been reminding me daily about healthy living and I just threw it all to the side this past week.

I’m not even sure I can blame it on the holiday season.  I mean, we were moving and I just couldn’t cook.  Fine.  BUT, I could have at least ordered grilled chicken or a fruit cup or a large water.  So, there’s no excuse.

Nicole at Juicy Alligator almost got me one day when she posted about another goodie, chocolate chip cookies.  I went to the kitchen to get some cobbler, but got an apple instead.  I was proud.  But, you know what I ate for breakfast the next morning?  That’s right… cobbler.  Urgh!

At this rate, I’ll never get in a bikini again… and, even worst–my whole family has been eating poorly.  I feel this is a reflection on me since I usually make the dinner decisions. I certainly hope I can get it together this week BEFORE the new year.  This is a minor setback and short-lived.  We will eat more healthily tomorrow!

Wow!  I really have to get one of these!  Let me introduce you to the TREADMILL DESK:

Who comes up with this stuff?!  I’ll tell you who–Dr. James Levine of the Mayo Clinic came up with this glorious invention that can help us work at our desks and slowly walk on a treadmill at the same time.

For you gymaholics, this may not be all that great.  But, for you stay and work-at-home moms who have some extra baby fat to lose (like me) and have the darnest time finding a minute to workout or you tech gurus who spend every waking minute logged on and are starting to notice that michelin tire forming around your mid-section, you really have to be impressed with this machine.

The average person can burn an extra 100 calories per hour by walking on this machine.  That’s certainly more than I burned while sitting here typing this post.  It’s more than you burned while reading it too.  Aside from losing weight, there are plenty of health benefits to gain by walking daily.  Who couldn’t benefit from being healthier?  Awesome.

…Now, if I can just figure out how to either make the doggone thing or come up with $5,000 to buy it…

It is not with pleasure that I write this post, but with somewhat of a warning… a reminder…

Yes, you guessed it.  There was another tragedy reported in the news.  Two 18-month-old baby girls were asleep on the couch in Northeast Houston, when their mom thought that was a great time to turn on two gas stove burners and leave them there sleeping.  That’s right.  The neighbor called 9-1-1 around 12:30 am, but it was too late.  The fire had already engulfed the couch the babies were sleeping on.  For the full story, click here .

Since IQ, common sense, or mental agility are not requirements for becoming a parent, we constantly hear of tragedies involving young children.  During the summer, people forget and leave babies in hot vehicles or unsupervised children run off to the nearest pool, jump in, and can’t swim.  Apparently, during the winter months, we have to be cautious of home fires.

Accidents happen.  I realize this.  We can’t watch after our children every minute of every day.  God forbid something like this ever happens to me.

On the other hand, some may argue these are examples of things that are within parental control.  Where should we draw the line between accidents and things that we make a conscious and intentional decision to do (abuse) or not do (neglect) in caring for our children?

The really awesome part about it, is the mother was questioned and released with no charges.  Was this an accident?  Was this neglect?  Was it abuse?  Child endangerment?  Or even criminal homicide… two counts?

Another part I found interesting is that the mother was outside screaming that her babies were trapped inside at the time firefighters arrived.  I wonder how many parents would have killed themselves to at least try and save the lives of their babies.  Interesting.

So–since all you have to have is a viable uterus to give birth, let’s rehash some safety tips for parents and parents-to-be to avoid an incident like this one in the future:

1.  Never leave your young children home alone.  Not very many states have passed laws on a legal age minimum.  BUT, the child must be able to care for him or herself and know how to respond in case of an emergency.  The maturity of the child and the particular situation should be taken into account.  The magic age is typically 8 years old or older for short periods of time (like latchkey kids waiting for parents to get home from work) and 12 years old as the most common recommendation.  Therefore, an infant around, say… 18 months old…is too doggone young!  Check with your state laws to see if there are legal age requirements.

2.  Never leave a stove on if someone is not there to monitor it.  Check and re-check to make sure your stove is off before you leave your home.

3.  If there is something you absolutely must do outside the home and you would rather not take your child with you, leave your child with a responsible adult to watch or call that adult over to watch your child.  It does not matter how long you plan to be gone…5 minutes…10 minutes…10 hours.  Something may happen to you while you are out that may delay your return.

4.  If you cannot find anyone to watch your child, tough.  Whatever it is will have to wait.  Review #1.  Remember, there is nothing more important than the safety and well-being of the children you have been blessed with the responsibility of taking care of.

5.  Don’t want to be a snitch?  Want the blood of someone’s children on your hands if you could have helped to prevent a tragedy?  Report anyone you know of who leaves their children in harms way.

The featured picture is of the sweet Wilson twins, that are tucked away nice and safe at home with one of my best friends.  Thanks for giving me permission to use this photo, Tasha.

Most recent news report update:  the mother left the stove burners on to keep the children warm in her absence.  How thoughtful.

    It seems like everyday I hear or read about another scam or scheme to rob your family of what you work hard to obtain.  I received a warning about this one in my email today.  While not the first of its kind, and I can’t be too sure it’s true, I thought–hey, why not pass this along just in case there’s some validity to it.  Maybe this could actually protect you or one of your loved ones.  Please note:  this was a forwarded message and I don’t know the original sender. 

“Just last weekend on Friday night we parked in a public parking area. As we drove away I noticed a sticker on the rear window of the car. When I took it off after I got home, it was a receipt for gas. Luckily my friend told me not to stop as it could be someone waiting for me to get out of the car. Then we received this email yesterday:  ‘WARNING FROM POLICE BEWARE OF PAPER ON THE BACK WINDOW OF YOUR VEHICLE–NEW WAY TO DO CARJACKINGS (NOT A JOKE)’

Heads up everyone! Please, keep this circulating… You walk across the parking lot, unlock your car and get inside. You start the engine and shift into Reverse. When you look into the rearview mirror to back out of your parking space, you notice a piece of paper stuck to the middle of the rear window. So, you shift into Park, unlock your doors, and jump out of your car to remove that paper (or whatever it is) that is obstructing your view. When you reach the back of your car, that is when the car jackers appear out of nowhere, jump into your car and take off. They practically mow you down as they speed off in your car.  And guess what, ladies? I bet your purse is still in the car. So now the carjacker has your car, your home address, your money, and your keys. Your home and your whole identity are now compromised!

BEWARE OF THIS NEW SCHEME THAT IS NOW BEING USED.  If you see a piece of paper stuck to your back window, just drive away. Remove the paper later. And be thankful that you read this e-mail. I hope you will forward this to friends and family, especially to women. A purse contains all kinds of personal informant ion and identification documents, and you certainly do NOT want this to fall into the wrong hands.” 

To my readers:  I hope you do not find yourself in this situation, but if so, I hope you are vigilant and safe.

To perpetrators:  Get a job!  Stop scamming people!